I need motivations please! I got 20/37 (77 grade) on our quiz in FAR 😦 and I’m the lowest!

I already have 3 lowest score :((

And I still don’t have recitation.


Not my day

Yesterday I was late for my first subject which is P.E, I got the lowest grade for the recitation which is 1.5! While reciting i experienced mental block.

On my last subject which is Understanding the self I got the lowest score for our first quiz with the score of 2 out of 20, and I still have no recitation which is very important.

I feel so low and devastated, But I learned some lessons, so I promised my self that I will do better now, for me not able to experience that again.

What’s the feeling of….

I wonder what is the feeling of someone asking you for a dance in a party? the feeling of dancing slowly with sweet music filled in the air in the middle of the crowed? Because i never experience it, I always left alone in the chair waiting for my friends to comeback after they danced! I always felt out of place whenever they are counting how many boys asked them to dance. I never had my first dance.

What is the feeling of having a suitor? Because i never experience it.

What is the feeling of having someone who always ask you if you eat already? Or someone who always there for you except to your parents and friends, someone who always appreciate you, taking care of you, saying how much you mean to them and how much they love you. Someone who can be your travel buddies, food buddies etc. Someone you can lean on and tell all your problems without judging you! Someone who will listen to your rants without getting tired of it? What’s the feeling? Because i never experience of had of it.

What’s the feeling of having someone you love that loves you too? Because i never had it.

What is the feeling? I want to experience all of it! I want to have it all! But why i can’t? I’m tired of being left alone, being a girl with no experience from all of that!

I sometimes feel pity for my self, pity because i feel envy for everyone who have it all, and i don’t want that! I don’t want to feel like that.